Stories
by UnderTheMoon412
Summary: storie 6 UP These are stories that My friends Annie S writes in health class at school. funnie little stories...better than it sounds
1. Girls Dorm

Hey all. My friends Annie Stoops writes crazy little stories in health class at school and she usually basses them upon draco and I. So heres a bunch.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything harry potterverse.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
(Draco)  
  
Snore  
  
la la la la la laa (smurf theme)  
  
Snore  
  
la la la la la laa  
  
Snore  
  
Fa la la la la la la la la (Christmas song thing)  
  
Snore  
  
Huh?  
  
Where am I?  
  
My Scar Hurts.  
  
I don't have a scar though!  
  
Pink Blankets?  
  
I'm in the girls Dormitory!  
  
Wait, that's a good thing.  
  
Who's on the top bunk?  
  
OH GAWD it's Hermione Granger!  
  
She's naked!  
  
(runs screaming in circles)  
  
Don't panic, Don't panic!  
  
My Gawd...I've got a tail.  
  
(Lauren wakes Up)  
  
Be invisible and she won't see you!  
  
"HI PANSY"  
  
(waves at Draco who looks down)  
  
OH MY GAWD I'M A GIRL!  
  
(wakes up panting and screaming)  
  
"THANK GAWD IT WAS ONLY A DREAM"  
  
(Lauren leans over and puts her arm around Draco. Hermione does the same from oppisite side)  
  
OH GAWD NO!  
  
(Draco wakes up or real this time)  
  
Gawd what a nightmare  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Well let me know what you think! I'll let Annie Know 


	2. The Child

Hey Just another little Story!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in the potterverse...i do however own Lauren...cuz thats me.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"OH Draco"  
  
"OH Lauren"  
  
"OH Draco"  
  
"Ho Lauren"  
  
" What...did you just call me a ho?"  
  
"UH.........UH........ER........Huh? Could you repeat?"  
  
"Get the hell out of my bed!"  
  
(Draco gets his ass kicked by Lauren on way out)  
  
"And Don't COME BACK!"  
  
(9 months later...)  
  
"Oh my Gawdit looks like Draco. I've created a monster!...A cute little monster"  
  
(She cuddles the baby)  
  
"DRACO...YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE!!!"  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I sorta modified the end because i dont believe in burning children but hey...tell me what you think! 


	3. Voodoo

This is a good one... let me know what you think  
  
Disclaimer...I own Lauren but i don't own any of the potterverse.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco: The Hills are alive...with the sound of screaming!  
  
Lauren: Dumass  
  
Draco: I think it's pretty  
  
Lauren: Pretty horrible. What makes you think of such things?  
  
Draco: You  
  
Lauren: Me?  
  
Draco: Well you do scream alot.  
  
Lauren: WHERE?  
  
Draco: In bed. You also bite, scratch, kick, and try to unman me.  
  
Lauren: You shouldn't say such things.  
  
Draco: Why?  
  
Lauren: Because someone might be listening.  
  
(audience leans in closer)  
  
Draco: HI POTTER HI WEASLEY HI (hand clamps over mouth)  
  
Lauren: You're a dead man!  
  
Draco: mummble mummble mmble mmmmmmmm (lauren pulls out a knife) mmMMMMMM  
  
(screams die out as Draco slowly dies)  
  
In girls dorm at Gryffindor Draco's voodoo doll put up by a smiling Hermione.  
  
Lauren begans to malt slowly as Hermione holds her doll over a candle. (still smiling)  
  
(Annies runs around singing "Joy to the world they both are dead")  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Very interesting! Anyway...see you later! 


	4. Snape's Undoing

Hey and yet another!!  
  
Disclaimer..I own Lauren and nothing more.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
In Snapes classroom Draco got up and walked over to Potter when Snape left the room.  
  
"Hello Hairy Poturd"  
  
"What do you want Malfoy?"  
  
"OH nothing, just wondering why your potions all over the floor"  
  
"It's not"  
  
(malfoy bumps into Harry's cauldron. Everything spills on the floor and starts rotting boards)  
  
"Oh I'm so sorry Potturd...guess thats another F."  
  
(Malfoy smiles and walks off to go flirt with Lauren)  
  
(Potion still rotting the floor which is starting to move)  
  
"Harry Potter"  
  
"Yes, sir"  
  
(Turns around and looks at Snape who is standing in the middle of the potion-soaked floor.)  
  
"What is your potion doing all over the flaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!"  
  
(Snape falls throught the floor and dies, Harry looks at Draco and Smiles. Draco and Lauren are currently groping each other)  
  
"Malfoy, I think you just did us all a favor."  
  
(Malfoy looks horrified then he speaks)  
  
Oh Gawd No I"M A MURDERER  
  
(Malfoy goes crazy and gets put in St.Mungo's)  
  
(Lauren dies of grief after a few tries of murdering harry doesn't work)  
  
(New D.A.D.A teacher...Sirius's ghost)  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
So what do you think? Review and let me know. 


	5. Love Strip

Hey all...Yet another one!  
  
Disclaimer: I dont own anything but Lauren.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Once upon a time in Hogwarts castle...  
  
Draco paused, looked twice, 3 times. Oh Gawd it was Lauren.  
  
Draco happened to be in love Lauren but she was quite indifferent to him. Didn't ever know he existed. Tonight was sooo gonna change everything between me and her Draco thought.  
  
Later that night in the Slytherin girls dormitory...  
  
Yawn* By Gawd this is boring Lauren thought  
  
She was studying for the O.W.L. potions test tomorrow. She didn't need to see how awesomely smart she is but she did it anyways.  
  
Lauren put awya the book...all of the sudden Draco comes in.  
  
Romantic music starts playing, a disco ball floats down, music goes to rock.  
  
Draco strips to the music, Lauren's eyes pop out (Not Literally)  
  
Whoa, What a hottie, she thinks and its a one-woman show. Too soon Draco is done stripping. Now he's entirely naked and Lauren's in love with him (and his bod.)  
  
"I love you." She says.  
  
"I 've always loved you." He says.  
  
They started dating, it lasts all through school and they end up getting married and have children that look like Draco. Yah. 3 cheers for Lauren Malfoy, Ruler of the Malfoy Mannor.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
::smiles great big: I like this story! Even though i'm really cheap...hehehe...he loves me he loves me he really loves me. ( In My Dreams!) I'd like to thank the academy, Jesus my savior, my family and friends. This award ::holds out golden man:: Goes to Annie Stoops because with out her...this wouldn't be possible. ::tear::. LOL! More to come soon! Check in everyday! 


	6. Pimp Cane

hey all yet another! disclaimer: i dont' own anything except for my character which is lauren!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
The story of the Pimp Cane  
  
Once Draco found a cane  
  
It was pimp  
  
It became Draco's pimp cane  
  
That was pimp  
  
.........  
  
Once a pimp lost his cane  
  
It was pimp  
  
Then he saw Draco pimpim' his cane  
  
That wasn't pimp  
  
.........  
  
One Lauren was a hoe(*)  
  
She belonged to a pimp  
  
One day she pimped Draco  
  
That was pimp  
  
.........  
  
Once alle these people met  
  
The Pimp  
  
The Hoe  
  
The Draco  
  
The Pimp Cane  
  
Here is the argument that unfolded...  
  
"Biatch you pimpin' my cane and my hoe? Now you got to die!"  
  
"I found this cane and this hoe...well, she found me...Now you got to die!"  
  
"Stop yelling at each other I'll dp what I want and your not my pimp. Now you got to die!"  
  
" I know I'm just a cane but you are all nuts. Now you got to die!"  
  
.........  
  
One day there was a cane  
  
It was pimp  
  
It murdered 3 people in cold blood  
  
That was pimp too.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
So what do you think r/r. I liked this on...very funny! 


End file.
